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| an excerpt from a daily written journal, and possible excerpt of hopefully future book/novel...or whatever
Dated: December 26, 2009
Woke up, the day almost half ticked away. The sun has risen high above the thick blanket of clouds that covered the sky just how the snow which has now melted by rain once covered the ground below, and it has revealed the earth underneath. First things first, he checks his cellphone for any source of overnight joy that comes from a simple text from Theresa (name changed in case she might read this...she'll probably know its her though anyways). But unlike the many previous days and nights before, there was none. Not sure of how to feel, he kept on his back deeply buried in his firm bed heavily shielded by blankets trying hard not to be the one who initiate talk since the risk was too high.
This emotion stayed with him the entire day but it grew as the moments pass. He was so used to talking to her every minute of every day that a little more than 24 hours of no communication took a toll on him and felt forever. Sadness and loneliness made their way inside even though he was kept busy by family on this boxing day (Canadian holiday). Surrounded by hungry hippos of awesome store sales in the mall, he still felt alone. In a corner where he couldn't move an inch from...he was stuck and he knew that the only thing that could save him was probably too busy with her own life. A life of which didn't include him, or if it did, he played a very insignificant role just like an old piece of gum stuck under a desk, unwanted and almost despised. And this he felt for he knows that it could very well be true and accurate like a Marksmens shot.
For even just a day and a possibly more, his light was put out revealing that the night was ever so black. And as John Steinbeck once wrote, "It's so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone."
...but in the back of his mind he feels...a light that shone even for a second provided more joy and hope than any complete darkness ever could. And this light, he cherished very well. | | |
| Adulthood is nothing but a tombstone.
A mere reminder that our childhood innocence or ignorance and the childish ways we have lived has come to past.
Some people say to live life to the fullest, make mistakes, and be a fool.
Well those people are foolish for thinking we can live as fools. They are just trying to live or relive childhood however lifeless it may seem. The people who say to live as if you were a child is just plain...well ignorant.
We cannot look at only the good parts and close our eyes on the hurtful, bad things.
We cannot ignore the responsibility that grows with freedom and assume that everything will just take care of itself.
The more realistic way to live is to be an optimist.
To see the good not only in the good, but in the bad and the ugly as well. To be able to use experience as a lesson learned.
To see happiness in despair, joy in sadness, and life in death.
Sure the glass may be half empty, but that half a glass of whatever...it is YOURS!
So fall in love, knowing that even the most precious roses have thorns.
Truly we all come from childhood, and it is our root and foundation. Without it, life would not stand nor be fruitful.
So instead of reliving the childhood or torturing yourself in sadness.
Think like a child, act like an adult. And be optimistic, hopeful, and make your dreams come true. Otherwise, growth and thus change will cease to exist. | | |
| The sun may not shine as bright
Nor the moon be as full
The air may not be as fresh
Nor the flowers smell as good
The outcome may fall short
The summer be less hot
The earth turn slower
What was yes may be not
The breath may be half
And the heart skip a beat
The sea may be cold
And the blueness of sky be less bold
The winds be too strong
And the road be very long
The fall may be hard
Run out of ace cards
The fire may burn small
May not feel as tall
The noise be too loud
Get lost amongst the crowd
In too much pain
Be a small sand grain
May not feel as great
Possibly feel grudge and hate
The reward may not taste as sweet
but in life...that's NO reason to retreat
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| You are human.
A perfectly normal human being. Someone who is afraid, vulnerable, emotional, a being very much less than perfect.
As most of us, you have spent your whole life waiting...
waiting for perfection, waiting for changes to happen...good changes
waiting for everything to come through as planned
waiting for friends to change, to like you, to listen to you, trust and see you more than just a means to an end.
waiting to see if everything will turn out okay, if it'll eventually work out, even though deep down you know that only time is keeping you together.
waiting until the sun starts the day because you are too afraid of the night, of what you cannot see.
You wait for all of these and more because you don't know what's in the future, and often times you're afraid of it.
Afraid of making a mistake, a wrong turn, the wrong choice.
Afraid of the unknown, the unexpected, the unplanned, the unthinkable, the unimaginable!
Often times you're afraid of change or making changes because you get too comfortable with what has been in the past and what is in the present and you don't want to change that, however unpleasant it may be.
You play it safe because because by staying safe you are not prone to surprises because you hate surprises!
You are too afraid to move forward and to grow because doing so gives you more responsibilities.
Waiting and being afraid is a state. It doesn't lead into anything or anywhere...living does.
Sure the world is cold, cruel, unforgiving, tough, frustrating, dangerous, hard and anything that would hinder us from fully living...but KNOW that the world and life is also
beautiful, awesome, full, peaceful and most of all...rewarding!
Life is full of rewards. It is out there!
You just need to stop waiting for things to happen and MAKE IT HAPPEN!
Stop being afraid because we all are and it doesn't do any of us any good.
Make a mistake! everyone does, it'll make you a better and stronger person.
Take chances, turn off the lights, walk around the corner, make a change in your life and in others, take a leap...
Shoot for the moon because even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
Life was never about the outcome, because the outcome is death..the end.
Life is about the journey, and it starts when you stop waiting, let go of your fears and start living.
"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it...
Nobody said life would be easy; they just promised it would be WORTH IT."
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